Who is my inner child?
She has long brown hair tucked behind her ears. 2 big front teeth that appear oversized for the size of her mouth. She’s aged seven. She’s wearing a loose t-shirt with tassels and light floaty patterned cotton skirt. And brown strappy sandals. Its hot here. I’m not sure where here is but that’s irrelevant right now.
How is my inner Child?
She’s not doing a lot. She’s standing, leaning against a wall with a slightly cheeky expression spread across her face. She’s okay with the not doing.
Where is my Inner Child?
She shyly takes my right hand. She leads me to a little fairy garden. Here, there is sand and rocks, big boulder type rocks, surrounding the base of a large tree which acts as a canopy. There are little wooden mushrooms and fairies and a pond with a small well in it. As I study her face, she feels slightly magical, definitely peaceful. Its her world. She’s playing. Happily.
What gift do I give my Inner Child?
I invite her to come into harmony and balance with me. And the gift of time. I take a moment to be with her. To hang out together, being, unstructured time.
What does she do with this gift?
She gently draws the energy in through her mouth. She does a floaty little dance to demonstrate she has received it.
How does she feel now?
A little more floaty. She felt light before.
What gift does she give me in return?
A little chocolate ladybird wrapped in red and silver foil.
What do I do with this gift?
I pop it in my mouth. Its thick, warm and creamy. As it melts, it coats my mouth. Its pleasurable. It makes me smile.
What message does she (my Inner Child) have for you?
She gently mouths the words, “don’t worry” as she strokes the back of my hair. I wonder what I’m worrying about or if I am worrying at all.
What is the gift of this message?
She gives me a little baby toy mouse. She has it in the pocket of her dress. The mouse represents the worry. It is small. So is the worry. Yet it doesn’t easily go away.
Where in my body do I resonate with this worry?
In my tummy.
What colour is it?
Dark purple, like thick smoke.
When did it first attach itself to me?
I don’t know. It could be a past life. I could be aged five. It’s thick smoke. I want to wash it off myself. I find it gross. It leaves me feeling confused, disgusted. I want to wash it off.
It’s happening to me. I’m powerless. I feel stuck. Not knowing what to do. Not knowing how to stop it or put an end to it. It resonates with a good family friend. He’s got a playful childlike energy, he laughs a lot. He knows this energy and space I’m in. He too has been here.
Another man, another name comes into my consciousness. He’s the father of my friend. I was always uncomfortable around. His daughter was my age. She taught me masturbation and to insert things into my vagina. Somehow energetically I associate him with this energy of unease.
I’m left with a feeling of confusion, disgust and dirtiness.
What do I need to release it?
White light to wash it away. To wash away the feelings of powerless, stuck-ness in my arms and legs. The dark purple smoke in my tummy.
Do that.
It is done.
Fill the space created by its release with the white light.
Does your Inner Child have anything else to say to you?
Have fun. Be carefree. Take each day one step at a time.
What can remind you of this?
A feather in my hair. Its warm, soft and light.
Where do you want to place your Inner Child?
In my heart.
